Dear Russia

Dear Россия,


On my last night here (since tomorrow night I’m being picked up at 2 am I’m not counting it) I want to take the time to thank you for everything this year. I know I spend most of my time complaining about the blisters I get from so much walking, depressing about the weather, and laughing at your crazy sense of fashion, but in all seriousness this past school year has been incredible and I want to thank you sincerely for that. These past few days making the rounds for the last time for a while have made me realize just how many memories we have made together. Picnics in the park by school, pushing through the winter wind to volunteer at the Hermitage, sunset over the gulf, smiling inwardly at American tourists who are trying to read Cyrillic, singing and dancing while Jarlath plays guitar, walking down the embankment when we could have taken the bus, and even the first time we discovered where the free bathrooms were in the center. Your beauty, both natural and of human design, continues to take my breath away, somehow even the Khrushchev buildings here at Primorskaya have seemed almost beautiful this past week. You have reminded me of how wonderful it is to get lost in back alleys and then find your way again, how a handwritten sign pasted on a wall inquiring after a lost hamster can make you smile just as quickly as a professional comedy show. The resiliency and generosity of your people continues to amaze me. Events of an entire age fill one lifetime here, so when the grandmothers are elbowing their way through the metro you carefully remind me that they have seen and experienced more than I can begin to comprehend, that everyone has their own story and their own fight. Your young people do quite often have a broader perspective than their elders, some look forward to leaving and heading west but many others are passionate in their love for you, their homeland, and I know they will serve you well as artists, engineers, politicians. Thank you for introducing me to them and their perspectives and dreams. I may not agree with many women here on their self-image and social status, but I am incredibly grateful to them for their willingness to engage in discussions on the subject and make me examine my own assumptions and opinions. I never really thought I would say this, but I am also grateful to your men; for making me stronger, more self-assured, and more certain of the woman I want to become. That woman will hopefully utilize all of the things I have learned here in the classroom, as well as on your streets. My teachers have provided me a glimpse into the life of a Russian intellectual, and for that I am just as grateful as I am for all that they taught me from books, films, and conversation. I hope you will allow me to meet them again someday soon, when I have been able to more fully grasp the immense impact they have had on my life through their language and cultural instruction and their role as a window into Russian life. Thank you for placing Irina Borisovna and all of the CIEE staff in the right place at the right time, I cannot imagine Russia without them. They have shown you in the best possible light, I only hope I can do the same as I try and show you to my friends and family. Thank you, perhaps most of all, for the generosity that runs so deep in your national character that a family could take in a stranger and make them feel as if they were one of their own. I absolutely cannot imagine this experience without Ira, Pasha, Grandma, Lena, and Nadia. There are simply no words to express how grateful I am, so I won’t attempt it because you already understand, nor are there any to express how much I am going to miss them. I cannot say I am going to miss everything about you, dear country of mullets and inefficiency, but I know I will be leaving a piece of my heart here, otherwise the tears wouldn’t be in my eyes. In just over 24 hours when I am on my way, and when I am gone, think of me, dear Russia. I’ll be seeing you.

Much love from a grateful heart – Бет Анне